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I am an educator, counselor and healer
talking about ADHD, Aspergers and anxiety DIFFERENTLY. 

APPEARING

Bi-Monthly article in 
MY Magazine
Scarcity and Abundance

There Are No Lazy Students
September 19, 2014: Golds Memorial ADHD Conference at OCC Orchard Ridge Campus

Remembering
...and becoming...
Who You Really 
Are 
Cosmic Cruise: New Orleans to the Caribbean Nov 10-14, 2014; please mention my name if you are booking.

COMMUNITY EVENTS

Through April 13: Falling at Meadowbrook Theater, Rochester. A phenomenal play that explores family dynamics with an autistic son. 

April 25: Living with Autism Conference; Marriott Hotel, Troy (Fee)

September 19, 2014: Golds Memorial ADHD Conference at OCC Orchard Ridge Campus

Welcome to the Spiral Wisdom Newsletter

A Place to Learn about Sensitives; and Life, Autism, Aspergers, ADHD and Anxiety


SCARCITY OR ABUNDANCE?
Which best describes the way you approach your life, and why does it matter?
 
In author Stephen Covey’s book, The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People, he describes the mindsets of scarcity and abundance.  Abundance is the recognition that there are enough resources and successes for everyone. He contrasted this with the scarcity mindset, which focuses on not having or being enough.
 
When scarcity is your mindset, you believe there is not enough to go around. Scarcity is founded on the idea that if someone else wins or is successful in a situation, another loses. There is little consideration for the possibility of all parties winning. Scarcity, therefore, often results in destructive and unnecessary competition.
 
Compare this mindset to those who see life as abundant. Individuals with an abundance mentality are able to celebrate the success of others rather than feel threatened by it. Abundance is the realization that there is always enough and that we need not worry about quantity and opportunity - for ourselves or for others.
 
You may believe that you live in a mindset of abundance, but it may surprise you to know that you sometimes fall into the scarcity mindset. To determine how well you stay in abundance, look at the small experiences in your life:
 
Do you save items to be used later rather than enjoying them now?
Do you worry that others are ahead of you in life?
Can you fully applaud the achievements of others, without comparing your own? Or, do you wonder if there will be an opportunity for you to reach others’ achievements?   
Do you focus on what you have, or is your focus on what you lack?
When you see what is lacking in your life, do you find yourself in Fear?
 
One belief that creates scarcity thinking is the assumption that we are all separate; but when you realize that we are all one and that there is no difference between us, you can gain a better appreciation for the happiness and accomplishments of others.
 
An aspect of abundant thinking is recognizing the difficulty that others may have achieving this mindset. Have compassion for those who you perceive as angry or narrow-minded. They are actually filled with fear. Fear and scarcity frequently go hand in hand. Fear fosters the belief that if you have something, you will keep me from having it and you therefore must be the enemy.
 
The best way to combat your own fear or the fear that others direct toward you is by using its opposite: love. When you demonstrate a loving countenance, people will respond positively to your words, your actions, and your energy. Your loving, unconditional acceptance of them is what helps lead them away from their own fears and scarcity beliefs. 
 
Imagine if all of us focused on the adequacy of our own lives – there would be less competition between individuals or between groups. As I think about this possibility, I wonder, would people still be so divided over politics? Would countries and cultures be at war? Would people of faith accept that there are many other ways to worship? Would families and coworkers engage in petty arguments?
 
I hope that peaceful coexistence and the abundance mindset will be the norm in my lifetime.  We each hold the possibility to create this reality. Developing an abundance mindset creates optimism and joyful thoughts for ourselves. As we subsequently interact with others, we radiate this positive energy of acceptance and unity. Oneness replaces separateness, promoting societal changes and ultimately greater peace on earth.
 
Thinking with abundance brings possibilities for peace and acceptance for us all. We change our planet one person at a time, and it begins with ourselves. As you strive to bring more abundance and peace into your life, consider author Doreen Virtue's affirmation: I accept good graciously into my life; all of my needs are met abundantly for me now and always.

Lessons I've Learned

New ASD Statistics
(GMA 3/28/14)
Newest statistics show that 1 in every 68 children will be on the Spectrum with a 4x greater prevalence in boys. Screening at 18 months is now available and highly recommended to begin early treatments leading to milder cases. But there has also been an increase in the more severe forms of autism as well.

Understanding Stress/Anxiety and Learning
The amygdala is our protector. When there is a dangerous event, it prepares the body for fight or flight. Unfortunately, the amygdala hasn't evolved to recognize the difference between a true danger and a challenging conversation or test. 

The amygdala also affects the prefrontal cortex interfering with our ability to reason clearly. It is therefore no wonder that anxious students have difficulty learning.

The brain has provided a potential over-ride. The basal ganglia can execute actions automatically and isn't affected by fear. But it's necessary for the brain to have experienced repetition for the basal ganglia to work in this way. This process explains why professionals like fire fighters and police can provide protection in the face of danger.

It may unfortunately also explain why PTSD is so common after combat or other traumas. Military personnel have been instructed through repetitive action, how to handle dangerous situations without thought. This works well - in a war zone. But when an established trigger is recognized by the brain as danger, the basal ganglia often responds during a state-side situation with the same high-alert and/or response as was required while serving under mortal danger. 

FAVORITE QUOTES

I am an evocateur of the possible and a midwife of souls. 
Jean Houston

You have to create the quiet to be able to listen to the very faint voice of your intuition.
Jon Favreau

RECOMMENDED READING

Life, Animated: A Story of Sidekicks, Heroes, and Autism
Ron Suskind.
An adaptation from the book was recently published in the NY Times. A fabulous story of how Disney movies were used to reach and teach their autistic son. 

Tips for Sensitives

Sensitives have acute awareness in several or all of the 5 senses, as well as intuition and empathy.
 
Responding to Meltdowns
Frequently I will encourage a client to examine a previous meltdown experience (or other frustrating time). I find that they are often unwilling to explore the event. Turns out that by doing so, they re-experience the emotional and physical response as if it was happening again. No wonder the person refuses to 'talk about it'.

Our goal is NOT to re-traumatize the person! Assure them they
are safe. Proceed slowly. Begin with yourself. Calm your energy by slowing and softening your voice and your body movements.You can move inwardly (and respond) at a fast pace, but your energy must remain calm. 

Encourage them to remember the event as if they are watching a movie. Observe their body language, voice and breath. At the first sign of agitation, pause the process and assure them of their safety. Provide the relaxation tips that work for this individual. They need time to trust - you, the process and themselves. 

When they are calm again, encourage them to continue the process. Remind them of how good they feel once they successfully identify what had troubled them. Also teach them an awareness of what was happening in their body that resulted in the meltdown (sensory overload).  

It is important to teach this technique to parents, educators, and even administrators. Hopefully they will also recognize when it's appropriate to get help from someone who can best facilitate this process. 

HEARING FROM YOU

Emotional Overload
Sensory overload is not just a response to the 5 traditional senses (visual, auditory, smell, taste, touch). We must also remember how powerful the emotions are for many individuals on the spectrum. One of my autistic clients describes emotions (even joy and other positives) as physically painful. 

Channeling

Consciousness, Compassion and Vessel
These form a very interesting triad for Sensitives, and those on the Spectrum. We feel comfortably aligned with our consciousness - our brain and our connection to Source. We also align easily with our Compassion - loving All That Is. But Sensitives struggle with the Vessel. The body is frequently the source of pain, discomfort and/or distraction. There is therefore a tendency to attempt to disconnect from the Vessel and all its input. This is short-sighted. The whole purpose of being in this form (Human) is to align all three equally and allow them to communicate with each other. When we shut out the awareness of Body we are also stifling our Compassion and Consciousness. When we allow ourselves to accept the Vessel, all three will pulsate in equilibrium and provide an opportunity to be
Who We Really Are. 

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