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THE CHRONICLE
February 21st, 2019

“Rather than condemning it, Duke should get creative and loosely use the rest of its social scene off the model.” - Mitchell Siegel on Greek life, and why he defends it.

The Least Popular Announcement Since Dinosaurs Roamed the Earth 
As you know, only students with wristbands for the UNC-Duke game were allowed in K-Ville before the UNC-Duke game last night. AKA, no tailgating in K-Ville for non-tenters. And let us tell you, people were pissed. Like, planning-a-protest-on-Facebook kind of pissed. To top it off, strict rules were enforced in K-Ville for the small population of students who were able to tent, including a ban on hard alcohol and drinking games. AKA, no beer pong. What gives, Duke admin? Apparently, the new rules were put very firmly in place in order to prevent the chaos that ensued after walk-up line last year. So firm, in fact, that the DSG’s resolution asking the admin to change their rule was shut down HARD. Like we said…realllly firm. Let’s just say, students all around campus are starting to feel like the admin talks a big game about students coming together as a community but has too many rules in place to let them do so. And to let them be normal college students. 

Time’s Up for Lisa
Literally. Lisa Borders, the first president and CEO of TIME’S UP, will deliver the commencement speech for the Class of 2019 this coming May. Borders, a Dukie herself, was previously the president of the WNBA before resigning to switch to TIME’S UP, a movement against sexual harassment founded by lady bosses in response to Harvey Weinstein and #MeToo. However, a few days after she was announced as the commencement speaker, Borders stepped down from her position at TIME’S UP. Is that awkward? No, don’t worry, she didn’t resign due to malpractice, but rather because she needed to focus all of her attention on a recent family issue. Though Borders only worked at TIME’S UP since October, she won’t be short of experiences to talk about. Her list of positions and accolades is longer than the Nile River. In addition to serving on the Duke Board of Trustees since 2015, she has also served as the vice mayor of Atlanta, the chair of The Coca-Cola Foundation, VP of global community affairs at Coca-Cola, and more. Sheesh! 

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows
Duke’s version of the Hollows are prettyyy fancy. The new dormitory complex, which is located near Towerview Road on West Campus, is expected to be completed in July. Maybe next year students will actually be guaranteed that so-called “guaranteed on-campus housing” we heard about when we applied. Lucky for you, The Chronicle got the chance to check out the simulation of what the inside of the new dormitory will look like. The building will be split into two halves: A and B. While A has a two-two-story common room with a kitchen and a big space for studying and activities (so much room for activities!), B has their big common room in an elevated, glass-enclosed area.

MAYEDAY
We hope by now you’ve been able to dry your tears after the heartbreak of a century last night. Within seconds of the Duke vs. UNC men’s basketball game last night, Zion Williamson took a tumble that cost him a mild knee sprain and left him out of the action for the entire game. He broke through one of his Nike shoes on a dribble, leading him to fall on the ground, clutching his knee in pain. Nike released a statement after the game regarding the shoe that was torn to shreds, stating that they are “working to identify the issue” and “wish Zion a speedy recovery.” After losing their star player, the Blue Devils struggled to keep up with UNC for the rest of the game, ultimately taking the L with a score of 88-72. On the bright side, we did have some pretty freaking cool visitors come to see the game, including Spike Lee, Todd Gurley, Mike Posner, and OBAMA!!!


See ya, Davidson 
The Duke men’s baseball team demolished Davidson Tuesday evening, riding 5 no-hit innings to crush the Wildcats. Despite the MLB Draft’s theft of three of our pitchers, the team started their first week of the season off strong—and we suppose we don’t blame them for leaving. No. 22 Duke sent Davidson home 7-3, striking out 14 hitters during the game. This comes after they destroyed Towson over the weekend, scoring 32 runs, and crushing Lehigh, during which junior Bill Chillari struck out all six Lehigh batters he faced. Hah. See ya, everyone.


 

Frats are Back
Well, three of the four that were suspended earlier this semester pending investigations into hazing allegation. Pi Kappa Phi’s, Kappa Alpha Order’s and Sigma Phi Epsilon’s suspensions were all lifted by the Office of Fraternity and Sorority Life. However, Delta Tau Delta’s suspension for hazing allegations has not yet been lifted. Ruh rohhhhhh. We know, you’re dying for more deets, but the OFC didn’t give us any dirt about the results of the investigation into their hazing. President of DTD Matthew Gallardo noted that the frat is aware of the allegations and is working on handing the situation with its central office.

Application Overload
When we say overload, we mean 41,000. Yes, you read that right. This year, Dean Guttentag announced, Duke received over 41,000 applications. That’s about 4,000 more applications than last year, and leaves Duke with an acceptance rate for regular decision applicants of about 6 percent. Yes, you read that right too, and we’re just as glad as you are that things weren’t this way when we applied…According to Guttentag, the pool of applications is so massive that 75 percent of the students who apply scored in the 99th percentile. Having such a large applicant pool means we have the “luxury” of picking the most interesting students from among the smart ones…yep, that means Guttentag is calling us all interesting and brilliant. Stop, we’re blushing!

Survivor Sowell
A Duke undergrad is about to pop up on your TV if you’re an avid watcher of ‘Survivor: Edge of Extinction’ And if you’re not an avid watcher, you may just have to become one to watch his season. Keith Sowell, a current junior, sent an audition tape to ‘Survivor’ last year, and months later received a phone call accepting him on the show in the middle of his Spanish class. He spent this past summer filming Season 38 of the reality show, based in Fiji, which requires contestants to provide for themselves in an isolated location. As per classic Duke student logic, Sowell says that he hates outdoorsy things, but had to be on ‘Survivor.’ He is the youngest of the 18 players on the upcoming season and is the youngest African-American competitor ever. According to Sowell, the competitiveness of Duke’s educational atmosphere prepared him for the experience. Perhaps a little dark, but likely true. Since Sowell can’t reveal what happens in the new season, we’ll all just have to tune in. Did he eat a bug? Did he fall in love with a fellow contestant? Did he spear a live fish? Did he eat his own arm? We’re dying to know!!!

Duke v. UNC Rivalry Edition
Hot off the press! Yesterday, the Chronicle released a Duke vs. UNC Rivalry Edition to give all the Cameron Crazies (and the people who didn’t tent, who are just as important) all the info they need for this year’s matchup and about the rivalry’s history in general. They broke down every Duke starter, and how they match up with UNC. They also broke down the Blue Devil’s 10 most memorable wins in the series, interviewed renowned author John Feinstein about the development of the rivalry and the relationships between the coaches over the years, and more. This year, Duke heads into the rivalry match as the No.1 team in the nation for the first time since 2006. Yeah, baby. AKA, yeah, Zion. This edition is a collector’s item you won’t wanna miss. You’ll be thanking us when Zion’s in the NBA in the next minute.

Drown your UNC sorrows in churros and chocolate from Cocoa Cinnamon :(
  1. Pie a Line Monitor: Pissed at the line monitors for waking you up at 5AM in the freezing cold in K-Ville? Get that anger out for a good cause and pay $3 to pie a line monitor in the face. All proceeds go to the Duke Children's Hospital!
  2. Duke Dance Marathon: Come out to Card Gym tomorrow for another initiative to raise money for Duke Children's Hospital! It's a 5 hour long money-raising, performance-watching, free-pizza-eating marathon! Students will stand for the duration of the event to symbolize the emotional and physical challenges patients at Duke Children's Hospital experience every day.  
  3. JSU Senior Bar Night: If you're a JSU Senior, head over to Boxcar Bar + Arcade next Wednesday to celebrate your last semester. Sign up here!
  4. All of the Above: AOTA is a showcase presenting monologues written and anonymously submitted by female-identifying Duke students. Admission is free, first come first serve.
  5. TEDxDuke 2019: This Saturday, come out to the Reynolds Industries Theater to hear 10 amazing talks along with Enzos, Joe Van Gogh and lots more snacks!

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