September 19th, 2019

 “Eat the damn salmon”
- Rebecca Torrence, in her column calling out Duke students for targeting trivial issues instead of the real ones

Delta Sigma Bye 
We know what you’re thinking: didn’t we already say ‘bye bye’ to Delta Sigma Phi last year? Well, according to Phil Rodriguez, the executive director of DSig’s national organization, now it’s for real. According to an email Rodriguez sent to Duke DSig alums, Duke has officially closed DSig’s chapter due to “reoccurring risk management incidents.” He didn’t specify what, exactly, these “incidents” were, but they were enough to keep the group from being listed as a house on the Housing and Residence Life website this year. Yiiiiiikes. 

Has Anyone Seen $3.4 Million? 
Trinity’s looking for it. Yeah, well, so are we, Duke, so are we. Starting in 2022, Duke will promise a 12-month stipend to all Ph.D. students… a promise that costs $3.4 million. In Dean Ashby’s time here, this year was the first that Duke made its budget… and that’s without having to cough up the $3.4 mil that it’ll need to in two years. So, how will Duke put its money where its mouth is? Simply put, they’ll just have to. Apparently, the graduate stipend policy works like our need-blind policy—if Duke promises it, they have to deliver. Honestly, we’re shocked Duke hasn’t been able to cover the cost with all of the parking tickets they give out.
You’re A Failure
And that’s a good thing, if you’re in Duke’s new(ish) Innovation and Entrepreneurship course called Learning to Fail. The course has become well known around campus for the wacky challenges its students are often attempting on campus that are intended to teach the essential qualities for an entrepreneur: “resilience, awareness of difference, growth mindset, challenging discomfort, integrity, and mindfulness.” One assignment challenged each student to persuade as many strangers as possible to play tic-tac-toe in just an hour, with each stranger counting for a certain number of points based on their campus clout. An undergrad was two points, a basketball player was 25, and Coach K was 1,000 (way to boost his ego). Others are more serious, targeted towards pushing students to confront their vulnerabilities. Only question we have is…what’s the average final grade in this class? 
Bye Bye Eli
And hellllooo Daniel Jones! As you all know, and if you didn’t know, just pretend you did for your own sake, Daniel Jones was just named the starting quarterback for the Giants, replacing longtime starter Eli Manning. That’s gotta hurt. What a time to be alive for Coach Cutcliffe, who coached BOTH Jones and Manning to become the QBs they are today. QB College pays off, huh? Jones’s big debut on the field is this Sunday in Tampa, where the Giants will be taking on the Buccaneers. Viewing party at Devine’s, anyone?
D.J. Got Us Fallin’ In Love
In Cameron. Please welcome five-star guard D.J. Steward, who announced his commitment to Duke basketball’s 2020 recruiting class just yesterday. Steward marks the third five-star recruit in the Blue Devil Class of 2020, along with forward Jalen Johnson and guard Jeremy Roach. We are just…too good. Steward, who’s coming fromWhitney Young High School, averaged 24.1 points on a .406 three-point percentage over 11 games on the 2019 Nike EYBL circuit. We’ll take it. D.J., we’ve already fallen in love.
Oh Captain, My Captain
Even though Tre Jones passed on the NBA this year, he’s not passing on captain. Jones has just been officially named the third captain of the Duke men’s basketball team, joining 2018-19 captains Javin DeLaurier and Jack White. This marks the first time the Blue Devils have had a trio of captains since the 2016-17 season, with Matt Jones, Amile Jefferson, and Grayson Allen. Two’s a crowd, three’s a party.
No Life for Young Life
Last week, DSG unanimously rejected the Young Life, a national Christian organization, as an official student group, keeping the group from starting its life here at Duke. Ouch. The reason? People were notttt crazy about some of their policies. First, the national organization has a rule prohibiting LGBTQ+ students from running for leadership positions, which goes directly against DSG's nondiscrimination guidelines. The group’s sexual misconduct policy also bars LGBTQ+ students from working or volunteering for their mission work. DSGers suggested the group change their rules to comply with Duke’s nondiscrimination policy, but the group says they’re tied up in the group’s national rules and are unable to amend them. 
For the Foodies
We have some updates for you. If Sprout and Farmstead have been getting a little old, you’re in luck, as the two WU vendors are going under renovation soon. The new and improved Sprout would begin selling fresh produce, including fruit, in addition to their already-updated menu (have you SEEN that cauliflower crust flatbread?). As for Farmstead, its menu would be adjusted to provide healthier meals, since as of right now, it’s essentially become an extension of The Skillet and J.B.’s. The bad news? This means you may have to say ‘bye bye’ to one of the many mac ‘n cheese vendors in WU. Also…we know all you WU-goers have not been pleased about the lines lately (we certainly haven’t), so DUSDAC is working on that, too. As of right now, they’re considering redesigning the layout for the seating arrangements to try to fight the influx of students around noon. Because we are not down to wait 8 hours in line for a spicy tuna roll. 
Duke Fall Career Fair
Come out to Wilson Gym next Wednesday, September 25th, from 10am to 3pm for the Fall Career Fair. You absolutely won’t want to miss it. Over 100 global and local companies will be sending reps to talk to you about your interests in business, tech, education non profit and government. Check out the mobile platform used for navigating the fair and info about all participating companies here!! Woo! Employment!
Thursdays are for Pad Thai! 
1 . MEDIAVILLE, a mini-career fair for students interested in creative industries: in Wilson from 12 to 2! How does Mediaville work, you may be wondering? Essentially, you’ll get the chance to participate in a one-on-one informal Skype chats with reps from some of the nation’s top creative companies. You’ll have about 5 minutes to ask questions (and brag about yourself a little) about job opportunities and more. AND there will be Monuts. A job and monuts, what more could a person want? Some of the companies joining the fair include HBO, NBCUni, VICE, and more! 
2. Durham Night Market: Come out to the Durham Night Market next Thursday at 5:30 to check out 40 local vendors’ homemade products, food trucks, live music, wine, beer, and more! 
3. Cider Jam: Bull City Ciderworks will be hosting their 3rdAnnual CiderJAM this Saturday from noon to midnight. There will be six food trucks, six jam sessions with local artists/bands, and tons and tons of cider! 
4. Women’s Empowerment Expo Raleigh: This Saturday, come out to Durham Bulls Athletic Park for an entrepreneurial summit and social intended to empower small business owners and others interested in becoming entrepreneurs. 
5. TechConnect 2019: Come to the Fitzpatrick Center next Tuesday to connect with tech employers! Bring your resume and get ready to talk to reps and learn all about the opportunities they have to offer.
6. Nasher Sculpture Garden: Don't miss performances from 21 local musicians at the new sculpture garden on September 28th at 2 and 4.
7. Ride the Bus With Photographer Titus Brooks Heagins: Meet at the Power Plant Gallery and board the bus for a round trip to the Gregg MUseum of Art & Design in Raleigh to experience Southbound: Photographs of and About the New South. Pre registration required at:

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